Positive things that happened Last week

Positive things that had happened last week:

As I have promise myself, I wanted to write about positive things in daily life more these days to help myself feel less depressed; so here I am counting my blessings.

But first I want to acknowledge how scary it really is to experience a strike in action. One never know where to turn or what to do to keep oneself out of trouble yet upholding one’s morality and ethics. It is a very hard decision to make. This week, I was faced with an ethical dilemma as the strike begins. While higher governmental employees are getting an increase of salary at a sickening rate, people on the ground level were offered a merely 6.5% (a so called inflation in lined rate). I can fully understand and agree why people should and would strike!! Yet as a health professional, it is illegal and unethical for us to be striking. This places us in a situation of “we vs. them”. The health professional are the “them” who go against the crowd, hence we are in danger. But on the other hand, how can I watch patient die if the strike gets out of hand? It really was a very hard decision to make…should I risk myself to help or not? It had been fortunate that nothing of very destructive nature is happening… We are really lucky until otherwise proven.

To begin with counting my blessings this week: There were 4 very heart warming incidences that happened to me this week. The first three were on Tuesday when I was at CHC clinic doing my job.

1) A mother expressed her concern and worries about “will there be nice people like you at the hospital? The people in the hospital don’t care as much as you did. Thank you.” It was very touching for me, for once; my service was well appreciated and I can sense that this mom will go home and do the home exercise programs I have demonstrate to her with her child.

2) An old lady in a wheelchair who had a long history of CVA had been really depressed. She came in for the 2nd time to see me, she asked me “doctor, am I going to be okay?” with her fearful eyes that shouts out to me for comfort and reassurance. I had to be firm and real yet caring, so I said to her “Mama, I am afraid that your stroke is going to stay pretty much the same as it is.” She replied, “I know doctor, I know that my body is old and it does not heal so well anymore.” I felt her last hope fading, I had to instill hope in her so I attempted, “Mama but God has not forgotten you, look at what a great family you have got. Look how much your daughter cares about you, God is still with you.” That moment, our eyes met and we connected. This had touched me deeply and I think this moment will always be remembered by me or perhaps her as well.

3) Lastly, with a gentlemen that is there to see us for the 2nd time with his daughter. The same complain from his daughter persisted, “he don’t do nothing, he swears at us and don’t cooperates.” But something told me that I saw the picture differently, because of the way he looks confused when we speak. I really felt sorry for him for getting into trouble with the OT students previously— he was so misunderstood!! At the end, what it was is that his hearing aid had broken so he cannot hear what you said to him and therefore he does not understand what is required of him which makes him look uncooperative. I was angry with the family but yet understood that his daughter must have been feeling tired and burnt out for looking after him while others in the family do not help much at all.

The positive moment came when Dini (my rotation supervisor) said to me “Anita, it was really sharp of you to have picked that up.” My reward for being quiet and quite an observer had finally come. After all, it is not all that bad to be an introvert who can sense and feel for others more easily. I felt that finally, in a world of extroverts (or pro-extroverts); being an introvert has its values and place.

The last one came in yesterday evening while I was queuing at the ATM for cash, a colleague that was due to leave for a HOD post in Joburg came queuing behind me. We chatted after we got our money and he asked my plans for next year. After I told him honestly about my plans, he said to me “well if my hospital had a post open, would you consider it?” I thought to myself, “wow! What a compliment in disgust!”. Despite we have not known each other for that long, he thought I was a good person to work with. It meant a lot to me that the world does not think about me the way I thought they would. Some people actually values me and likes me.

I know here I may sound like a depressive patient in a ward and I admit that my self esteem is not that great ever since I didn’t get into medicine. Further, I doubt myself a lot, not only because I am not the most confident person in the world but because I believe that I am much more all-seeing and observant than most so I want to be and am humble.